Daily tasks to have a healthy relationship

Going forward with empathy and solidarity, building a joint identity and sharing a way of looking at the world are some of the tips that Sebastián Girona offered to Entremujeres.

Just as people have diseases and health problems, couples and bonds can also have them. This leads us to think about the state of health that a relationship can have and what we can do to take care of it.

To have a healthy couple, the first thing we have to do is try to be fairly healthy ourselves. What is to be healthy?

I’m not talking about that to be a couple you do not have to have any problems. There is a saying that “up close no one is normal” and this means that as we get closer to people and know a little more, we realize that no one is completely normal and that we all have our problems and difficulties.

Today we talk about the concept of “psychological well-being” that has to do with the fact of being able to travel life with certain well-being that manifests itself in different areas such as work, home or interpersonal relationships, but that also coexists with the ability to face difficulties.

That a person has psychological well-being does not mean that he never gets sad or that he never gets anguished, it means that the person to whom those things happen (like everyone else) has the capacity to face them and the possibility of overcoming them.

So, in order to form a healthy couple, it is not necessary for both of them to be perfect and not have any problem in life but rather to approach this definition of “psychological well-being”.

Couple with their own stamp

It seems interesting to me to be able to think what it is to be in a couple since in general, we do not stop to think about this.

For me being a couple and forming a family is not just about living together, going to the supermarket, going on vacation, raising kids, etc. In any case, it is about all that and much more, or rather, all that and something deeper.

The couple and the family – later – have to create an identity, a way of living and look at the world and also create a certain mystique to face problems and happiness.

As for me, the couple has their own life and, in turn, their own health also has their own self-esteem, which will be reflected in the moments in which the couple must face problems, both external and internal.

To the extent that the relationship will overcome difficulties, that self-esteem will increase, developing increasing confidence to face the adversities that every couple will find in their path.

At this point, it will be important that over the years you can generate some of this to strengthen your self-esteem and create your own identity and personal brand.

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There is no recipe to form a healthy couple but there are some clues that can help us in the task:

Daily tasks to have a healthy relationship

1. Empathy.

All psychologists specialized in couples say that dialogue is fundamental in a bond and this really is so.

The important thing is to be able to realize that dialogue is much more than talking.

To dialogue is to be able to be empathetic and be able to look at things as my partner is seeing them. Dialogue and empathy are about sensitivity to the other.

2. Respect.

It is extremely necessary that in a couple there is mutual respect.

We talk about considering the other in their needs and feelings.

Also not to invalidate the partner when he feels distressed.

3. Solidarity.

Today we know that a dose of solidarity is necessary for a couple to be healthy.

Being in solidarity with the other will allow the members of the couple to support each other and be able to strengthen themselves for what they undertake together or separately.

4. Friendship.

A certain percentage of friendship is necessary for the relationship.

Of course, I’m not saying that there only have to be filial feelings in the bond, although the ones that have to prevail are the feelings of a couple, it is necessary that you can be friends with your partner, laugh, communicate well, share.

5. Power.

In all bonds circulates power and the couple is not the exception.

According to how equally the power circulates within the bond, the couple comes closer to healing-or moves away-.

Maintaining a healthy couple is a daily task.

The bonds are not perfect, they become unbalanced with external movements, eventualities, but they can be redirected with mutual trust, self-esteem and a strong base of love.